Estimated Time to Pay

Some may remember that I had a computer meltdown last month, requiring the expenditure of a great wad of (plastic) dough.

The credit card statement arrived yesterday. I'm what is known as a deadbeat in the credit industry. I pay off my balance every month. Apparently, about a third of us do and it must piss off the bankers mightily.

Normally, I don't pay much attention to the fine print, just look at the total and the due date. Occasionally, I look at the minimum payment and am appalled at how low it is. And how tempting that must be to bad money managers. And how lucrative for the fucking banks.

My sweetie recently alerted me to a new feature on our credit card statements. The bank has kindly calculated how long it would take me to pay off my current balance if I paid only the monthly minimum.

The computer fiasco cost just over $1600. My statement says: 'The estimated time to pay your New Balance in full if you pay only the Minimum Payment is: 13 year(s) and 11 month(s).'

Considering that Apple deems its products 'vintage' after only five years, that length of time amounts to nearly three computer generations!

Must be a new rule for banks, yes? Why would they want to inform us how deeply in feudal thrall we are to them?

Screw you, TD. I'm going to transfer some dough from savings and pay it all off.

I'm proud to be a deadbeat.