My Easter Story

Years ago, my sister had gum surgery. (Note: Avoid if at all possible.) She was in pain and feeling shitty so I went to her place to keep her company.

It was around Easter and some network was running the de rigeur Ten Commandments. We were lounging on her bed watching and getting bored. So I went and found a bible (as an art history student, she sometimes needed to look stuff up), turned the sound off, and pretended to read relevant bits from it.

OK, she was weak but I was ON FIRE!

She'd laugh, then grimace in pain and tell me to stop.

Well, of course I didn't.

More laughing, more grimacing, more demands to stop.

Nope. I WAS ON FIRE!

This went on for quite a while.

I felt kinda bad, but I WAS ON FIRE!

Finally, she knocked me off the bed, physically shoved me down the hall to her front door, and literally threw me out of her place.

Only time I've ever been forcibly ejected from somewhere.

It was totally worth it.

Happy Easter. If you're suffering today, may you have as rotten funny a sister as me.


BONUS: How the Red Sea was parted.