Friday, 24 August 2012

Open Thread: Confess Your Embarrassing Gaffes

OK. Godel Noodle and I are having fun in the comments here, confessing embarrassing gaffes.

I'm declaring an open thread for anyone else who wants to join.

I'll reprise my (first) offering:
Embarrassing gaffes: In Grade 11, I had read Albert Camus but had never heard the name pronounced. So when I bragged to the snotty big-mouth class intellectual. . .
Top that. ;-)


Luna said...

EASY! I am awesome at the gaffe. It's why I'm so forgiving of them in politicians. I know they don't mean what their mouths are saying, half the time. The other have is freudian. :)

Okay... So I'm REALLY clueless about racism. I mean, it's embarrassing. So I'm in Canadian Tire, and there's this lovely little black child asking me question after question about what I'm buying, and I'm playing along, answering, and generally having a good time. Her mother finally told her to stop bothering me, and in the immortal words of Mike Birbiglia, what I should have said was nothing. What I did say was, "She's an adorable little monkey."

Cue her mother looking horrified. Me, CLUELESS, but knowing I've said *something* idiotic, KEPT TALKING. Fortunately, I said the right thing. Pop was with me, so I patted him on the head and said, "My own little monkey is 2. How old is she?"

The woman looked like she was having a hard time not laughing and it hit me. Like a giant ton of bricks. And then she burst out laughing while I sputtered and choked and said, "OH MY GOD I'm so sorry! I did not mean that like that and Oh MY GOD!"

She was in tears of laughter at that point, but finally said, "Yeah, that became obvious quickly." So while I sputtered and choked, she said, "Bet you don't make that mistake again."

No kidding. Good God.

Godel Noodle said...

- Roaring Applause -

Whoa!! I thought Fern Hill's existentialist pronunciation anecdote was pretty good. I thought my Visa thing maybe topped it by a bit.

But yeah... Luna, you stomped all over us! That's truly spectacular! There are some politicians who certainly have you beat, but as you pointed out, they're pros at this. No mere mortal could ever hope to compete with the likes of Dan Quayle or George Bush (or Palin)...or even Clinton's infamous brain-melting "what your definition of 'is' is" line (I hate to throw him in with the other guys, but that was one hell of an impressive gaffe.).

I hope the bar hasn't been set too high now, though!

Luna said...

LOL. I knew by the time I got home that'd I'd have a good story for someday. :)

Luna said...

I'm thinking I should have gone with the time I pronounced "chic" like "chick" during an audition. Except I still got the part, so no harm no foul. :)

Jarrah said...

Well just last week I misspelled "feminism" in the title of one of my "Feminism F.A.Q.s" YouTube videos and didn't realize until a commenter pointed it out.

But my favourite is the time I went on a first date that was going really well. It was like we had everything in common. After coffee and a game of Scrabble we went for a walk and then for sushi. By this time I'd forgotten he'd told me he was allergic to peanuts and I offered him some of my Goma-ae (spinach with sesame & peanut sauce). About five minutes later he was looking queasy and said, "Um, was there peanuts in that?" I said yes and he said, "Okay well I may have to go throw up soon."

I was so mortified. He tried to joke it off and said, "Well I guess now we know what we don't have in common: I don't believe in poisoning someone on the first date."

I laughed nervously and spat rice all. over. the. table.

On the plus side it was so extremely embarrassing that there was nothing to do but continue to be friends even though we gave up on the dating thing.

Beijing York said...

I was with my then boyfriend and another couple having drinks on a popular patio when the word twat came up. I do not have a soft or quiet voice and I actually boomed, "TWAT, what that? Trans World Airlines Team?" It took a long time to live that down.

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